February 3, 2023

Instant “Look Big” for Bear Attacks

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

A reader has sent me a suggestion on a new product to use in order to “LOOK BIG” when about to be eaten by a hungry black bear. The mantra from those wishing to make love to bears instead of dealing with reality is, when being attacked by a bear, “look big” and make lots of noise.

The below picture is an example of what the finished product might look like. You’ll have just one chance to make it work so better know how to deploy.

The Look Big for Bear blow-up dolly comes in an easy to carry pouch that can be strapped onto you belt or carried in your hand. It is hoped that another version will soon be available that can be carried on your pack like a parachute. When under attack from a bear, simply pull the rip chord and the Look Big for Bear inflates in one second and “looks big.” It makes noise like a party favor while inflating and stands 12-feet tall. One prototype is reported to look like Hillary Clinton – without any clothes on. Now that would scare a bear away. (Note: An original prototype was made to look like Barack Obama but each time the rip chord was pulled it was always several days late deploying.)

As was pointed out by the engineer, if traveling with someone, this quick inflatable “Look Big for Bear” gives you time enough to outrun the others in your party. This is sure to keep you from getting eaten by a bear.