June 21, 2018

Disrespect of a Telephone Pole

Police in Fairfield, Connecticut found a couple of dead skunks. One was nailed to a telephone pole with a sign attached that said, “Obama Stinks.” I think it’s disgusting that anyone would disrespect a telephone pole in that fashion.

DeadSkunk

FairfieldCT

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Can’t Touch That

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Would You Like to Ride in My “Space Craft”?

This ends much better than it started.

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76 Definitive Lawless Obama Actions

““Of all the troubling aspects of the Obama presidency, none is more dangerous than the President’s persistent pattern of lawlessness, his willingness to disregard the written law and instead enforce his own policies via executive fiat,” Cruz stated in the report’s introductory remarks.”<<<Read More>>>

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Is Snowden Really Negotiating For Return to U.S.?

Edward Snowden may finally stand trial as Russian lawyer for the NSA leaker reveals they are working with the United States on his return home

* Edward Snowden may finally return home to the United States it was revealed on Tuesday
* Snowden’s Russian lawyer Anatoly Kucherena said they were working out a way to solve the issue of his extradition with the United States
* Snowden has been charged with theft of government property and two counts of violating the 1917 Espionage Act for leaking classified documents
* This comes one week after the documentary about Snowden leaking this information, Citizenfour, won the Oscar for Best Documentary
* Snowden has said that he will return home if he is given a fair trial by the United States government
* He recently said his biggest regret through this all is that he did not come forward with these leaks sooner<<<Read More>>>

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UMass Drops Ban of Iranian Students From “Nuke” Classes

After consulting with the State Department, the university announced Thursday that it would drop the ban put into effect earlier in the month and continue to allow Iranian students to enroll in graduate classes in chemical, electrical, computer, mechanical, and industrial engineering, microbiology, physics, and polymer science.<<<Read More>>>

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Is There Beaver’s Ass in Your Ice Cream? Yum!

“I couldn’t believe there was beaver’s ass in my vanilla ice cream, coal tar in my mac and cheese, yoga mat and shoe rubber in my bread,” says Vani Hari, also known as the Food Babe. That’s why she started blogging about food additives, she explains in the introduction to her new book, The Food Babe Way. I can’t believe it either. But that would be because none of it is true.”<<<Read More>>>

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I Was There! No, Really, I Was

I was sitting here thinking again. I was recalling poor Hillary when she was nearly shot down. That was before “What Difference Does It Make.” And I was considering the mess Brian Williams has gotten himself into over “misremembering” which helicopter he was in that wasn’t taking on sniper fire or artillery. Today we learned that it seems that Williams told people a few years ago that he was at the Brandenburg Gate when the Berlin Wall came down…and he wasn’t.

This got me to thinking and trying to remember all the places I was at when important world events took place. I figure I had better refresh my memory just in case I get a call from the New York Times or NBC Nightly New seeking an interview. I don’t want to screw up.

I don’t think my being in the Patriot’s locker room with the old man taking care of Tom Brady’s balls, rises to the level of a “WOW” event. It was really nothing at all..well until Brady’s wife came in. So, let me see if I can remember others.

Did you know I was supposed to receive a Grammy Award for my rendition of Wolf Howling Blues, but Kanye West took it from me. What’s with that guy?

I missed the Berlin Wall coming down but I was there when Bin Laden was shot and killed. I was waiting in one of the helicopters. We sustained direct hits from 35 rocket propelled grenades, but somehow managed to get out of there only to face 13 days in the desert due to an horrific sand storm. Maybe it was because that chopper I was in was named, “Lone WOLF.”

Oh, yeah. You know that photo that Al Gore used often for his global warming scam of the polar bear clinging to a remnant of ice? I was there. No, really I was. I was behind the bear. The bear used was a tame bear and I was with a polar bear tamer and 6 other specialists crouched down behind the bear to make sure he didn’t run away. I gave the bear the hypodermic needle that calmed him down. That was pretty cool.

I was on “The Grassy Knoll” where liars claim the shots came that killed Kennedy. Those sounds were me shooting my brand new cap pistol Daddy had bought me for my birthday.

I did an interview with Japanese foreign affairs minister Mamoru Shigemitsu aboard the U.S.S. Missouri just minutes before he signed the Japanese Instrument of Surrender. It’s a good thing I was there because he was about to jump ship and refuse to sign the treaty. I talked him out of it. I just said, “What difference does it make?”

But my real “WOW” moment came when I doubled for Charles Lindbergh and became the first man to fly nonstop from New York to Paris. I was so embarrassed because I had been up in that plane for about 35 hours with no sleep or toilet facilities. I had urinated in my pants and soiled them heavily. Those French people hauled me out of that plane at Le Bourget Field in Paris, and I know they must have gotten shit all over their hands.

Walking on water was a close second “WOW” moment, but I know you wouldn’t believe me.

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Liars and the Lying Liars Who Lie about Lying

There are often two kinds of liars or incidents of lying. One is as indicated in the title where one person lies and another liar swears to the lie. The other one is as depicted in the photograph below, when the first one to lie is always outdone with a bigger lie from their fellow liar.

And that’s the truth.

WilliamsHillaryLiars

I am told this picture originated from The People’s Cube.

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Skinning a Flint

A man told a bank officer that he was going to Paris for an International Festival for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank. The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the guy handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The man produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank’s president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the guy from the “country” for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank’s private underground garage and parked it.

Two weeks later, the man returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07.

The loan officer said, “Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that you are distinguished alumni from Ole Miss University, a highly sophisticated investor and multi-millionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world. Your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Sweetwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?”

The good ‘ole boy replied, “Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?”

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